Keith Snyder is a mystery novelist/composer/filmmaker, the father of twin boys, and the moderator of the Multi-Dad message boards. His blog is at found at http://www.journalscape.com/keithsnyder. Here are some things he's learned since becoming a father of twins.
Life with Babies
- If you're angry with a baby, leave the room. An angry, sleep-deprived man isn't what little babies need. If the choice is between angry man in the room and screaming baby alone in a room, let the baby scream until you can get yourself together. These little creatures can beam high-frequency irritation waves straight into your cortex. Three hours of that, and anyone can get the slightest bit annoyed. Leave the room.
- Do not, under any circumstances, try to finish up with a baby so you can get back to something else. This causes angry man. See above. The baby is the only project, for as long as necessary. Put everything else out of your mind and take care of your child.
- You'll bond more with one, then the other. It's okay. It all evens out. Babies are people, with personalities. (Ours have the same personalities we saw on the ultrasound!) You don't get along with all grownups equally, all the time; sometimes somebody's just more attuned to where your head's at. Same with these little guys. Spend the time with them, figure out what each one likes, and everything evens out.
- Speaking of personalities, twins give you the gift of contrast. If we hadn't had two at the same time, we'd have just thought Oh, that must be how babies arewhenever our singleton did anything. With two, everything one does that the other doesn't just shows you who they both are. Our twins are like night and day. One's interested in the world; the other's interested in his feelings. One laughs when you might be about to do something funny; the other waits for you to finish being funny and says HEHEH! One's wide; one's slender. We wouldn't have this amazing ongoing character illustration with just one baby. (Or with two babies of different ages.)
- A happy baby who laughs because he's sure you're about to do some really funny thing is on God's list of things he made sure we got, to make up for all the crap he makes us deal with. Don't miss it because you're looking at your children as a task. They turn human and funny a few months in. Hang in there. The rewards are way better than you think.
That's off the top of my head. I just wanted to get it written down before it vanished. I'll add stuff as I remember it. Which I may never do. Remember; I'm sleep-deprived.
