aprilelizabeth writes: "I am hoping to get some good advice on how to stay sane while staying at home with my 2 and 1/2 year olds! I have boy/girl twins and some days feel as though I am losing my mind. Is that normal? ...though my family tries to be helpful, I don't know anyone personally who has had twins and have come to the conclusion that it is a unique experience that only someone who has been there can understand. I am a stay at home mom so I am also looking forward to speaking (or rather typing) with an actual adult!"
The isolation of being a stay-at-home mom can be overwhelming. Women who are accustomed to interacting with other adults in the workplace, find themselves in the company of babies or toddlers every day, and yearning for social connections. Mothers of twins or multiples may feel even more secluded. Not only are they meeting the demands of more children, but their feelings and circumstances don't match the experiences of moms of singletons.
Thank goodness for the Internet! It gives mothers easy, round-the-clock access to fellow moms of multiples. Just like aprilelizabeth, they can reach out to other moms for advice, support and companionship, and instantly connect with women around the globe. Stop by the message forum and join in the conversation. Find fellowship and friendship with other parents; share your wisdom and experience with others who are seeking advice. It just may save your sanity!
Forum Friday: Staying Sane At Home with Twins
By Pamela Prindle Fierro, About.com Guide November 20, 2009
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Hi. I’d recommend finding a nursery or a playgroup, part-time. My twins (girls) started nursery just before their 2nd birthday. I felt it was good for them to mix with other children, other adults and to do activities we didn’t do at home (I love books, so read to them a lot, but hate jigsaws and throwing games). Also we live(d) in an non-English speaking country and they needed to learn another language. It would also give you the opportunity to spend time with your son and time with your daughter – even going to the supermarket or the park is different when they have individual time with you. When they make friends you could play-date the twins separately – one at your house, one at the friends house – swap another day. Or play-date them with relatives – one to grandparents and one with you. Good luck.
You are not losing you mind, and yes, it is totally normal to feel that way – I still do. I have an 11 year old girl, and 3 year old girl/girl twins. I can tell you from my own life that twins are very unique. I enrolled at our local adult education center for “mommy & me” parenting classes one day a week. I was the only one with twins, but at least I got out with adults and the girls got out into a controlled environment (no outdoor park classes for us!). Since we are on a tight budget, I have yet to enroll the girls in preschool, but that will be my next step. We play outside a lot (live in So. CA), visit grandma & papa a lot, and I now try to involve the girls more in our daliy lives (shopping, cleaning) to work on sharing, math, etc. Also, remember to take time away from the kids for yourself (go get coffee/tea, window shop, etc.). It will allow you to remember that “you” still exist!